Monday, February 27, 2012

Opinions

Opinions are funny, aren't they?  We all have them, and we all think that the certain one's that we hold are somehow correct.  It doesn't matter what they are on, but if we have an opinion then we know we are, by no stretch of the imagination, right.
This concept has been on my mind a lot lately, and not because I have been thinking that I am right about everything, actually the opposite.  I have realized recently, through a lot of different conversations, my opinions do not matter at all.  Sure, they matter to me, and they should...I have them for a reason, right?  But, why should they matter to anyone else?  Why would I make them matter to anyone else?  That's what we do, all humans really, we make/force our opinions on other people.

I recently have been thinking about this a lot because I held a Spirituality Night for my community (something that we, as a JVC Community, have to do every week) in which we all shared our opinions on certain controversial topics.  I did this because I didn't know everyone's opinions in the house.  I thought this was pretty important, because we are called to love each other regardless and I began to realize what if someone that I live with has opinions that are radically different than mine?  I discovered that we all have different takes on things, but they weren't super different.  Which is a good thing, I guess.  Plus it wasn't so surprising since we all work and live together pretty cohesively.

However, something I noticed was that we all wanted our voices heard.  At least I know I did.  No one really backed down on expressing themselves and making sure everyone clearly knew where they stood on certain issues, this made me notice how things are expressed everyday in my life.  When topics come up, whether controversial or menial, we all have this proclivity to make sure we are heard in some way or another.  Even if the person is more inclined to be non-confrontational, they still make a point to express their opinion.
This made me think, what if you couldn't voice your opinion?  What if you physically couldn't or due to a law or way of living, you were not allowed to have the world hear how you feel about certain issues?

I have learned a lot this privilege.  One privilege I never thought I would ever really think about is the fact that I am able to express my opinions freely and openly, to anyone who could most likely not care at all.  I can talk until I am blue in the face about how I feel about TV Shows, movies, actors/actresses, politics, racism, gay marriage, and religion all I want.  All of which I do, quite frequently, because I mainly like the sound of my own voice.  I never thought what it could possibly be like to not have this privilege, and it's something that, I truly hope, I will never take advantage of again.

Thursday, February 2, 2012

"You Can't Pray Away the Gay"

I'm not sure why I have posted so much about religion basically every single time...probably because I deal with it on a daily basis and it is pretty relevant in my life.  However, today I can't really avoid it and I don't really wish to avoid it.  If I was still a college student who wrote an opinions column for my school newspaper I would be writing about this, but unfortunately I had to graduate so I am going to write/bitch about it here.

I woke up this morning and like every 20 something slave to social media I checked out my Facebook and Twitter only to find something very disconcerting about my alma mater, Saint Joseph's University.  SJUs Alumni Association has been hosting a contest throughout the last few weeks for Valentine's Day entitled "How I Met My Hawkmate".  Hawkmates are two SJU alums who are married.  Adorable, right?
The contest asks that hawkmates send in their picture with the story of how they met at SJU.  The picture with the most likes gets a $100 gift card to a restaurant of their choice.  Not too shabby.

Meg Edwards and her fiance, Katie MacTurk, submitted their picture to the Alumni Association to enter in the contest.  When their picture was not posted the couple gave the organization a call, only to find out that the Alumni Association did not think it would be appropriate given the fact that the school is a Catholic institution and the Catholic Church's stance on gay marriage and homosexuality.  Meg Edwards posted a note on her Facebook about her outrage and was shared over 300 times.  The incident was then posted on blogs and NBC news immediately.
Here is an example: http://jezebel.com/rights-and-rites/

During my time at SJU I was introduced to a lot of diverse opinions and stances on issues.  I was always proud, though, to be a part of a school that supported and loved each of it's students.  Despite being a Catholic university it has very liberal stances, like all other things Jesuit.  I learned more about gay rights and fighting prejudices during my time at SJU than any other point in my life.  Hence why I was so shocked, and ashamed of this decision to not post the picture.  I understand the Church's stance.  I recognize that, even though as a Roman Catholic I do not agree with it.  However, while to many it might not be surprising that a Catholic school would rule this way, to those that attended SJU know this does not fit SJU's personality.  Students and faculty at SJU work really hard to fight injustices.  I thought it was really moving to see my fellow alums stand up and fight and show their outrage at the decision.
Within a few hours and hundreds of Facebook postings the Alumni Association posted the picture.  However, it was a little too late.

I guess it shows a larger issue of the public opinion on gays.  In a day and age where there has been progression, there is still so much prejudice holding us back.  As a Roman Catholic it does hurt that my religion is not accepting to everyone equally.  I find myself trying to make excuses for both sides, and not being gay I don't know how to word my disappointment and frustration to those who illustrate ignorance, bigotry, and hatred.  All I can think to say is that "aren't we called to love everyone? aren't we called to care for others? aren't we called to treat everyone equally, with dignity and respect? what makes one's sexual orientation so different?"  Unfortunately, I don't have stories of prejudice and discrimination I do not know what a lesbian or a gay man faces on a daily basis.  I do, however, have friends who I care for and love that face these challenges, and my heart breaks for them.

For awhile I struggled with how to express my frustration and then I got an idea from a really unlikely source...Grey's Anatomy.  I know, kinda lame of me.  However, I think this scene accurately expresses my sentiment.  In the clip Callie, a bisexual, gets a visit from her father who disowned her after she came out to him.  Her father is a devout Catholic and does not approve of his daughter's "lifestyle".  He comes back to "make amends", but mostly to have his daughter talk to a Catholic priest and "pray away the gay".
The acting and writing in this scene is just brilliant.
When I first saw it I remember having this feeling rush over me like "of course".  That is the perfect way to fight this bigotry.  The simple fact that Jesus calls us to love, the simple fact that "Jesus is my savior".  It's just so beautiful and simple.

No matter what your religion or beliefs are...can you really argue with that simple point?  Can you honestly say you are a Christian and say that you do not believe in gay rights?  Can you honestly believe that you can simply pray away the gay?


After backlash the university posted the picture and it currently has 1,027 "likes".  I wonder if SJU will end up giving the couple the $100 gift card?  They also posted this comment:
‎"Saint Joseph’s University fully supports and is in agreement with the Catholic Church’s teachings regarding homosexuality and same sex marriage. 


As a Catholic, Jesuit university, Saint Joseph’s is a welcoming, inclusive community. Our focus is on respect and caring for all individuals as individuals."